tonight however is one of those nights where i can tolerate nothing but the catpower cover of red apples. and everything is jumbled and paranoid.
i have super stuffed myself on etheopian food and have been awake since 4 am.

now i'm running on 4 shots of esspresso and cant seem to get tired.
today i walked by bbb and said hey and he fucking ignored me. i couldnt fuckiing believe it. kinda a jerk move. i want to tell myself that there was no way he would have ignored me on purpose but i was standing pretty fucking close to him and he didnt even turn around. i suppose as crushes go it was 1> phasing out time and 2> since crushes had been moving along so smoothley there was bound to be a fucked up period.
was i expecting it and therefore creating it?

with the otherone i made a big deal out of getting together and then screwed myself over because i'm a stupid silly git.