maren came up from santi for a visit. her town is on an evacuation watch for the great big fires. and we have had a heat wave. i blame her of course for bringing the hot santa ana winds with her.

she and i went shoping today. i bought a really cute skirt and a shirt and a tank top and tons of underware.

i'm over projectionists. i think i'm through with sexual stuff. it is just really boring me right now. i cant stand it. i think just looking at fine guys and ooogglling them with keyon will be enough. i saw the brightest shooting star tonight.

what have i what have i what have i done to deserve this?

i dont know why i have been flaking so much on the driving school thing. i think i must be really scared or something. i'm not really sure. it is as if i dont really want to delve deep into my brain and figure it out. maybe i'm just to lazy.

do you ever feel like you always need to make people smile. sometimes i feel that way. i dont like it when people are sad. i need something new to do... i'm getting restless. i've never really felt that way before. restless in my job. the albany was so chill it was like hanging out and getting paid. i knew i was one of the best employees and i did my job well. i'm not sure at the shattuck. i know i'm a good employee but i'm not one of the best , although i try. sometimes i just get a little carried away with the manic side of things. i want the cheif of staff position. i have worked for landmark for almost 2 years and i just feel lost as floor staff. i want to move up. weather that means projection or management i dont really know but i cant stay there. i'm stagnating.

i'm still weening my self off of celexa. i only have 2 more half pills to go.... i wonder what is going to happen. i feel a little weird but i don't know if it is from the meds or from the weather.

johnny depp is going to be tim burtons willy wonka...... i have mixed feelings about that. i think will farell should do it. i also thing terry gilliam should direct.... i mean hello..... planet of the apes? i dont think burtons remake track record bodes well for him.......

this is keyon at burning man... isnt he cute?