have i explained my theory on my many crushes and obsessions? well. (oh my god there is a meat ball in skates on my television.) i'm just bored and un motivated. thinking about people makes me un bored... i get to think about interacting with them and how stupid i feel around them... the fun i have with them... the fuzzy feelings they give me. thinking of fuzzy feelings... ooohhhhh i got the 80's prom pictures. there is this really sweet picture of thatboy in his suit.... oooohhhhhh.... he looks so fucking hot.

speaking of today, and thatboy. i went to visit him at his job today.. he was wearing a white shirt and a tie.. looking all kindsa fine. i buy a water and he goes on his break.. a 10 min break. we go to his mom's house. we go up the stairs and honestly, i'm thinking about fucking.... jeeze did i just say that?.... yes...... but we get in there and his girl friday is sitting on the couch... aaaaaaaahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh why is it that he always has a girlfriend when i like him and not have a girlfriend when i want to be friends.... he seemed nervouse. but maybe i was just uncomfortable... for some reason everything that i said seemed to sound wrong... or off. ..... keyon got his ears peirced at a 10 and then streched to an 8 today... it looks really really good.

i start school tomarrow and i am quite scared... nervous ...aaarrrtgggggggg

i need to get my feet warm.